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Unity Candle at Jamie and John's home wedding in Norwich, CT

Unity Ceremonies

Connecticut Justice of the Peace
Ernest Adams
(860) 543-2334

Celebrating Your Day Your Way!

Unity Ceremonies
Table of Contents
Unity Candle
Sand Ceremony
Handfasting
Other Unity Ceremonies
Involving Other People

Welcome   >>   Unity Ceremonies

A Unity Ceremony is a mini-ceremony within your wedding.

It shows that you are an inseparable couple, united as one, legally and spiritually.

There is no extra fee for a Unity Ceremony!

For a Unity Candle Ceremony, each of you begins with a taper candle that represents you as an individual. The unity candle (usually a large pillar candle) represents your new life together. Together you light the unity candle, symbolizing the joining of your lives. Just as it is impossible to split the flame, so your two lives are joined into one. There are photos of Unity Candles below, as well as a link to the Unity Candle Ceremony Page.

In a Sand Ceremony, each of you begins with a container of sand that represents you as an individual. Both of you pour sand into a larger container at the same time, blending the sand and symbolically blending your lives. It would be nearly impossible to separate the grains of sand again, and your two lives are joined into one. There are Sand Ceremony photos below, plus a link to the Sand Ceremony Page.

During a Handfasting Ceremony your four hands are tied together, symbolically binding you. The colors of the ribbons or cords fastening your hands together can be emblems of what you desire in your marriage. For example, green for growth, red for passion, and gold for wisdom. There are photos of two Handfasting Ceremonies below, and a link to the Handfasting Ceremony Page.


Unity Candle

The unity candle represents your new life as one inseparable couple.
Lighting the unity candle together is symbolic of joining your lives.

Unity Candle at Christina and Gene's beach wedding in New London, CT

Manilyn and Jonathan's Unity Candle at their wedding in Groton, CT

The unity candles available in stores range from simple to ornate. Jamie and John, for example, had a simple white pillar candle with a pretty bow around it. The photo at the top of this Page shows it lit after their evening wedding.

Some have verses, such as the one to the left that says "This day I will marry my friend, the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love."

Manilyn and Jonathan, seen at the right, had a unity candle with a cross and the verse from the Bible that begins "Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful...."

Christina and Gene's Unity Candle and tapers on their head table at their wedding reception

Christina and Gene had their names and the date of their wedding on their unity candle.

It had two wicks that joined into one flame as the candle burned down. The top core can be replaced with a votive candle.


There is a whole Unity Candle Ceremony Page because there is so much to say about Unity Candle Ceremonies.

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Sand Ceremony

You might think "Sand Ceremony!" if you have a beach wedding,
but have you considered it for other locations?

Ocean wedding Sand Ceremony at Harkness State Park in Waterford, CT Doris and Melvin's Sand Ceremony at their wedding in Mystic, CT

A sand ceremony is a suitable replacement for a unity candle if your wedding is going to be outdoors, where there is the chance that the candle flames might be blown out by wind, or indoors where open flames are not permitted.

Cory and Dean's Sand Ceremony at their Groton, CT home wedding


The Sand Ceremony Page has more pictures of Sand Ceremonies and suggestions for making yours unique.

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Handfasting

Although an ancient custom, Handfasting may be an unfamiliar term.

Rachel and Josam's Handfasting at their home wedding in Ledyard, CT Handfasting Ceremony at an Elizabeth Park wedding in Hartford, CT

You may have heard Handfasting called a Celtic wedding.

Scotland, Ireland, and other Celtic lands formerly recognized a handfasting as a marriage just as binding as one performed in a church.

The ancient practice of handfasting gave us the phrases "Tying the knot" and "The Bonds of Matrimony".

In modern usage, handfasting ceremonies can include your guests' participation, making your wedding more dynamic and remarkable. People who actively participate tend to remember details much longer.

The Handfasting Ceremony Page gives suggestions for colors, materials, and helpers.

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Other Unity Ceremonies

Your unity in marriage can be symbolized in several other ways.

When we meet we can discuss such diverse options as a chocolate ceremony, loving cup, rose exchange, shell ceremony, red thread, beach glass ceremony, bouquet of love and support, wine ceremony, Celtic pebble toss, and hand washing. These are just some of your options! Because your love is unique, together we will design a unique ceremony that is yours alone.

The most important thing to remember is that your wedding will be as unique as you are!

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Involving Other People

Whether you want to honor your parents, children, family, or special friends,
we will find a meaningful way to pay tribute to those you love.

There are many unity ceremonies for involving your families.

Children often feel the need to be included, especially the child or children of a parent taking a new partner. Having them take part in a Sand Ceremony or Handfasting is easy and safe. We can talk about how to include children from previous relationships when we meet.

Your parents can bring forward the candles for your Unity Candle Ceremony, for example, as well as escort you. (The days when only the bride was escorted down the aisle are fading fast.) Some couples honor the people who raised them by presenting roses during their wedding. A happily-married couple can pour sand as a base for your own sand during your Sand Ceremony, symbolizing the foundation of love that they gave you.

Members of your wedding party could tie the ribbons or cords of your Handfasting, if you would like to honor your special friends that way.

If you would like all of your guests to participate in your shell or pebble ceremony, we can easily arrange that, too!

This Site is intended to give you some basic ideas. Please call me at (860) 543-2334 to arrange a meeting to discuss your wedding. There is never a charge for the initial meeting!

One of the important criteria for choosing a wedding officiant is the officiant's willingness to encourage other people to participate actively in the ceremony. Beware of the officiant who insists on doing everything!

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